December 20, 2017 will remain to be one of the most memorable days of my life as it’s the day I got my first tattoo. Why I only got myself to typing out this story is beyond me. But after finding out that some close friends still don’t know about it, I guess it’s worth sharing.
You see, I have always wanted to get a tattoo. Something about being inked fascinated me, and the idea of owning one’s body in that sense just appealed to me. Overthinking it? For sure. But, given that having a tattoo means permanently adding another layer to your physical self, for me, is a big deal. Or, probably, was? Anyway.
After months of seriously mulling over it, and after much encouragement from acquaintances, I contacted 55 Tinta and next thing I knew, I was already on the table with my earphones plugged and the needle piercing my skin.
The process wasn’t as painful as I thought. I expected to be crying my heart out during the entire thing, but it helped listening to the entire “Reputation” album of Taylor Swift. On loop. For the 2-hour session. Clearly, Taylor Swift got my back when no one else did.
It was such an experience, despite the pain and the thoughts in my head. The occasional “What am I doing to myself? Why am I putting myself through such torture? This tattoo better not screw itself up in the long run!” But, really, all worth it.
The healing process of the tattoo took a while just because I didn’t allow it to “heal properly”, but what do you expect from someone who always wears shoes, right? To be honest, I haven’t gotten around to taking a photo of how it really looks like now because part of it, for some reason, just got “erased”. It still looks like that, more or less.
Now on to why you’re here.
Getting a tattoo perhaps is one of the few things I have done sincerely for myself since 2017. While, yes, I went on to vacations to unwind, those were ultimately so I could be more productive at work—taking a few days off so I could just charge into higher productivity. But getting inked was solely for my benefit. 100% just for me. It’s a step into further understanding and defining myself as I navigate in this world.
You see, I believe in the idea that everybody has the capacity to grow and become better versions of themselves—if we believe in it and if we do something about it. While there are several factors that could hinder us to realize our potentials, it is our responsibility to find ways to chase after our dreams and to be who we want to be. Easier said than done, I agree. But there is merit in pushing ourselves to be able to realize our own vision and to find our corner in the sky.
I have been sharing with a couple of people the past few days the importance of believing in oneself and to constantly remember that we could outdo ourselves if we allows ourselves to. We have to allow ourselves to dare and dream bigger. To take flight and will ourselves to lead our lives. At the same time, it’s equally important to remind ourselves that sometimes we have to just spread our wings and let the winds blow us and help steer us towards where we’re meant to be.
And, you might be wondering, “So, Macky, how is this all related to doing something for yourself 100%?”. Everything.
I get into dark moments in my life. Sometimes I am able to get out of it easily, sometimes I’m in that space longer than I should. I don’t have a real, strong support system. I have my friends, I have certain circles, but I don’t have a foundation. A base. I don’t have it. I only have myself. So while I am strong on this belief of achieving our potentials, of outdoing ourselves, of leading our lives and willing some things to the Universe, I need to be reminded of it sometimes, especially when I’m in the dark. But, I don’t have a friend or any person who would slap me to my senses and bring me back to be the strong person I know I am.
Having this geometric wing tattoo on my foot keeps me grounded on my convictions, and it helps me to remember what I believe in. For the past year it has actually gotten me out of the dark and I know for some it may sound weird, but I think this just underscores the importance of putting much thought into getting a tattoo, for me at least. I know some people who get inked without having placed the same amount of thought, and they’re adventurous that way. It’s all good. We have our own ways much
And if you ask me if I will get more tattoos in the future, the answer is yes. Most Definitely. But, much like this first one, it’s also a matter of putting much thought what to get and where to place it.