Totally Unexpected

My day hasn’t been the best of days. This morning wasn’t so pleasant at all. At one point inside the car I had to start breathing heavily because I was having a hard time to breathe normally. My head started to ache badly and I just wanted to breakdown…

I felt that a lot of things were just overwhelming me all at the same time and everything’s just weighing me down. I know you might go on saying that some people have it worse, that I have to suck it up and just move on. Yeah, I know that…but am I not allowed to cry every so often? Am I not allowed to feel pain? There are the times when I ask myself why when bad things happen to me, they happen all at the same time. The moment I settled in Matteo I just wanted to toss everything and wail and just fall on the floor and just let myself feel what I was feeling: tons of misery with sprinkles of intentions of running away from everything… but I didn’t.

Went to my LS125 class and arrived a bit early. I was just looking out the windows and my German classmate pinched me and asked me how I was and it would’ve been easy to lie and say that I’m okay, that I’m just sleepy…but no, I couldn’t. I had watery eyes and I just had to tell her I wasn’t feeling at my best. During class I started to make myself feel better by just covering up what I was feeling by thinking of happy thoughts like Blue Christmas, France, the sensation of sipping a Peppermint Mocha while people watching. And at one point when Gianna was holding my Moleskine, my German classmate, Mirjam, got it and placed a sticker on my planner. She didn’t stick it, really, she just placed it on top. And I swear, it made me feel a lot better. A LOT better.

It was totally unexpected, really…and it made me realize how, lately, most of the people who have been so kind to me are those I’m not really even exactly close to.

Unexpected, totally unexpected that the one who made my day better is someone I just met a few weeks ago. So, thank you Mirjam! I really do hope you continue to enjoy your stay here in the Philippines. 🙂

Totally Unexpected

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